I am guilty of being too reasonable.I was in our church meeting this Sunday morning, and we moved from drinking tea and chatting, to the band getting up, someone getting enthusiastic on the microphone, ‘let’s praise God’... Inside, I was groaning. I felt like a teenager watching their Dad busting a move in front of their friends. I was embarrassed about worshipping God.
Here’s why I was embarrassed. However cool the music, praise is just not normal, reasonable behaviour. One time, my next-door-but-one-neighbour pulled up in his Alfa Romeo and asked me who in our house did all the singing [Two doors down].
“Um... that would be me. Sorry.”
He honestly said, “No, it’s very good. Are you practicing for something?”
Ah. That one made me pause even longer. How on earth can I explain this so he actually gets it, and so I don’t sound like a complete weirdo who deserves no lenience when my guests park in his space? Here’s what I came up with:
“Er... not really. I’m singing.. to God.”
He actually didn’t seem at all fazed by this answer. Maybe it makes more sense to him than me. Maybe there’s something wrong with how I feel about this.
On Sunday morning, I realised public praise times aren’t the only Christian thing I feel embarrassed about. I feel embarrassed about the youth theatre I’m doing in Mile Cross – I feel like we’re coming in to build our own thing and constantly getting help off other people without giving anything back. I’m realising that’s not true because I’m noticing people are pleased to see us.
I feel embarrassed about sharing my story of Jesus working in my life with folk at our drop in, because they’re living hard lives. I feel embarrassed writing on here, and I try and phrase everything ultra-carefully so that people who aren’t Christians don’t think I’m wierd.
I even rehearse arguments that back all this up – saying ‘it’s important to communicate in a way that un-churched people can understand’, to ‘be culturally relevant’, to ‘make the good news understandable’...
The arguments aren’t wrong. But I think I fixate on them for the wrong reasons. I come at them to save my embarrassment rather than to help other people. I tie myself in knots trying to present my faith as reasonable to the world around me.
This is so completely the wrong way around. It’s making the opinion of the world the ultimate master on my actions in the public square. I won’t do things that this master wouldn’t like. The master is in my head, saying yes to this and no to that. I relate to Jesus at this master’s indulgence, as long as it doesn’t interfere with the way he runs his house, UK society.
And as I try and describe what’s going on inside me, it begins to sound rather familiar. The prince of this world discouraging the sons of God, trying to keep them out of the game. I’ve been conned. I’ve been had.Here’s what Marcus said on Sunday morning: “Is there space for anything on the throne as well as Jesus? Every day we’re getting asked this.” The answer should be, ‘no’.
My perspective has been completely wrong. YHWH is the King. The earth is YHWH’s and everything in it. The fate of the world and everyone’s in it will be decided by Him, only. What is right and wrong, appropriate ways of behaving, are determined only by Him. Whether people like it or not is up to them. Some will get it and some won’t. It’s not up to me to manage people’s reactions, to work out the best way to bring them into the kingdom of heaven. That’s God’s job and I should stop trying to do it for him. My job is to do what he tells me. To only answer to him.
It is ridiculous to let my life be controlled by what society thinks is right. Society doesn’t have a clue. It’s the blind leading the blind, and it’s wisdom can be judged by the results – the happiness, contentment, harmony, justice, equality, flourishing, and value we’re all experiencing. Not.
I’ve been under the thumb of the world. I’ve obeyed it rather than obeying my Father who loves me. I’m no doubt going to keep doing it, too. I feel a bit mad about this. I want to feel a lot madder. I don’t want to stand for it any more.
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Hear what you're saying man. It is all too easy to worry about what others will think, or to get embarrassed about things that are different.
ReplyDeleteI want to encourage you on the whole communication deal...
My personal feeling is that to some extent we should be concerned with how we say things, and how we present ourselves. It's not about changing the message, as I think you're suggesting with the whole 'making my faith seem reasonable' idea. But I think it's also about being sensitive to people and learning how to communicate well.
You want other people to get the gospel really badly. It bothers you when you hear messages that you feel others might be offended by. And you cringe sometimes at the way Christians go on about stuff.
I don't believe this is wrong.
But if you're annoyed with yourself, or embarrassed about your own actions then you're just like everyone else in that from time to time you struggle to be wholly comfortable in your own skin. God does give you the confidence to do this though, so when you feel like this, perhaps that's a good time to reflect on who God is and ask him to help you with feeling okay in yourself.
I think your train of thinking is rooted in the double hit of a) being pretty empathetic and b) being very self-reflective.
You are both in ever-increasing measure.
Communicating is an art that requires two things - 1) we have to know what it is that we're trying to say, and 2) we have to know the person we're trying to say it to.
Spending time learning about your message is vital. But I think you need to invest similar amounts of time in learning about your audience. After all, communicating is not about saying clever things well; it is about inducing understanding in the person(s) these words are directed at. One is not the other, necessarily.
I think you should carry on being sensitive to social norms, cultures, the way people are, and the things that make them tick. These things shape people and will influence the way they understand the messages that are directed at them.
So to communicate well we need to grasp this stuff. But, I guess you have to be careful that you don't slip into the trap of becoming ruled by these things. In the end, we'll never get it completely right, and yet despite this, God's purposes are worked out in the world daily. He is good!
Hello from Canada :)
ReplyDeleteI stumbled across your blog today, and I think your posts are indeed very well crafted - not just well written, but with a good message. So don't worry too much about the image ^.^
I also tend to be embarrassed about some parts of my faith, sometimes because, like you said, I'm giving too much importance to what society thinks, but sometimes also for other reasons. For example, I hate feeling like I'm being stereotyped into a group of people because of my faith. I may be a child of God and part of the body of Christ, but that doesn't make me any less of an individual! Maybe it's not as drastic in the UK, but here in North America, there is a whole Christian subculture with famous musicians and speakers who all have the same kind of frame of mind to which I can't completely relate. But Christianity was never supposed to be a culture in itself; it was meant to be a counter-culture... Anyway, I think we all have issues with our image, and as long as we acknowledge them and don't let them hinder us in serving our Lord, we'll be just fine. Toning down my ego a bit does the trick for me ;)
God bless you!